3 tips to overcoming the pessimist mindset in negative situations

As I am sure you have been able to see from my previous blogs, I am naturally a very negative thinker. From the get go I would always look at the glass half empty instead of the glass half full. In the more recent months as I have continued to grow and evolve as a being, I have started to change this mindset. I'm still not fully there yet, but I am on my way. Here are 3 tips that have helped me in overcoming the pessimist mindset:

1. Actively look for the positive

This is definitely something that is easier said than done when it comes down to it because it is a guarantee that you're going to go through some crappy times in life. It's just the way of the world. But it is also guaranteed that during these crappy times, there is still some form of good in your life. For example, at the end of my sophomore year of college I was going through a breakup, had to quit the sport I had played my entire life, transferred schools, and was completely overwhelmed. I was not happy with myself or with my surroundings. But the one thing that remained a constant while everything else seemed to be falling apart was the amazing support of my family. They have never wavered on their love for me, and that was one of the best positives throughout that period of my life. It's the little things like that, that we are able to find in every situation. They're not going to be the first thing to pop into your mind when you're struggling, that is why you have to actively search for it in that situation. Grasp on to that positive and don't forget it. Can't find a positive in your situation? Remind yourself that you just haven't found it yet... But it is definitely still there.

2. Don't throw yourself pity parties

I was the QUEEENNN of this (sometimes I still am.) But it is so so detrimental to not only our mindset but also our attitude and actions as well. I have one general rule that I try my hardest to follow in unfortunate circumstances: I allow myself one day to cry about it, be upset, eat my feelings away, whatever I need to do in that day to get those negative feelings out. Then I wake up the next morning, pick myself up, and it's on to the next. Time waits for no one so it's definitely not going to wait for you while you're throwing yourself a week long pity party. Mentally strong people do not allow a negative circumstance to permanently effect their mindset in life. Allow yourself one day, a couple hours, or whatever sufficient amount of time you need, then keep it moving.

3. Remind yourself that everything happens for a reason

I know a lot of people have problems with this saying, but I have not found one situation in my life where it hasn't been true. After my sophomore year when I was having to transfer I ended up coming to Lindenwood where I have had many more opportunities career wise than I ever would have at Missouri Western. When I had to quit soccer because of my injury, I was no longer able to run and turned to lifting as my new form of exercise. Turns out, I love my body physique and have so much more self confidence from the body I have gained through lifting. These are all small things but they are so reassuring to me when I am struggling. I know the plans that God has for me are ALWAYS bigger and better than anything I could have ever planned for myself. The same goes for you. You might not see the reasoning now, but it is there.

Sincerely,

KU :)